Every office needs that one sassy colleague with the fabulous Z-snap ready to dish out the most painful sentence you can hear in a day. Or maybe you’re that sass master that no one seems to be able to defeat in terms of quick-witted tongue. Whichever one you are, we know you’ll love to have these because passive-aggressive Facebook status is so last decade.
1. Another Level Of Coffee Mug
Look, there’s about 8 hours a day that you can speak to me but it doesn’t mean you should actually use all 8 hours to speak to me. The only time you’re allowed to be in the same vicinity as me to speak is when my coffee is above the dangerous line.
2. Statement Shirt For Days
Oh, look at my shirt today! Have you seen it? I even used the best font ever, Comic Sans, to tell everyone about how I love my fun job. Ignore the yellow text at the bottom, that’s totally not where my fingers are pointing at right now. Please. Please.
3. Hi Felicia, Bye Felicia
In an office full of hundred other idiots, you’re not that important for me to actually remember so you this is how it works: you get a button badge telling you to buzz off. Be grateful I actually took the time to get this pinned on my shirt today.
Are you implying that I require your comments on anything that I do? Are you implying that I should care? Because I really don’t and I hope this throw pillow printed with meme arrows will get my points across for me without me having to resort to violently give you eye rolls.
So which one of these are you planning on getting for your next office stationery supply? To be honest, we think all four items are important as your good luck charm to ward off unneeded people.